I can hear the constant thoughts
pour out, like a wintry wall of rain.
And theres something calming ‘bout this
endless falling, in and out,
of Joy and Pain.

Nowhere to run
when it’s all coming down.
The noise is blurring all around.

Look up and cry, but don’t know why,
it’s going and fading,
into night right now…

Oh my, oh my… dear heart.
You’ve done yourself so wrong,
so many times.

And I, oh I… I don’t know,
where we got lost in all the signs.

Maybe we’ll make this up.
Maybe we’ll go
and make things right.

Or maybe we’ll just get gone,
and try
to keep this
song
in tune
tonight.

Now where is it?
I can’t hear that certain sound
Not anymore.
I can’t feel it.

Now I’m fighting.
To find something
that I didn’t use to have to
search to find.

And what if it isn’t here?
What if it never really ever was?
Can I face that?

Illusional ponderings that swept right thru my dreams…

The rain has stopped pouring down.
Or maybe it’s there
and just won’t make a sound…

Will I ever be sure? Surely not.
But I’ve got to take you on your word.

It’s freezing and
this endless night has got
Me thinking
I should stop this fight

My heart and my mind
Are struggling to find
The reasons that came so quick
So long ago

But the sunlight has gone dark
And warm weathers far
From the places where words meant
Something here.

My deepest fear
Has fallen out.
And I can’t fall back
Not here. Not now.

And I’m sick. I can’t stomach
The truth spilling out
of my mouth. of my mind. out my hands
And I’m blind

but I see, now I see, what I should have
Done before…

Moments passed.
Loved. Allowed. Understood.
Gone and How.

Didn’t I know when I was…
Not until I wasn’t anymore.

I’m sorry.

Time misused and confused.
Stop.
No singing those blues of your eyes
Stare me down, pull me quicker than
Sands I could drown…

And the snow takes its time.
It unfolds and
It rhymes.
Inopportune.
But we climb, mountains just
To see it fall.

Can’t catch it all…

marelle

poetry free verse rambling words written

Concentrated moments appear
to have Another -
Force of Life, breathing, down their necks.
Blackened evil visions,
Consume the eternal fire.
And leave a frosty trail
Lost in the distance.
Quandaries around this atmosphere of delusion
Only seem to add on to my level of Confusion.
Written down, but spoken out -
of context.
Crimson-aquamarine flush in between
the sanity of my illusional signs.
Decipher the scrambled feedback of my mind.
Famished by the hunger that is eating at my soul.
Where is the control of my own life?
Not with me - never so.
Predetermined future -
leads me running in the wrong direction,
But right because they knew I would go left.
Can’t beat the system with a stick
but we still try to anyway.
Run away but go ‘round the world
End up back where we started.
Different time but same place
Different eyes but same face
In the space we like to call - utter fear.

marelle

insanity small world rambling thoughts love life poetry

What is going on in my mind? I wish that I could just empty the contents here and noone would be the wiser. it appears that there are many discrepancies in my life. that many rules make for broken ones stretched truths and flatout lies. Figure it out. What is feeling? Right now it is an uncertainty in the back of minds that is waiting for the moment to return to the spotlight. I believe this intermission will soon be over. The taste of adrenaline wets my lips and I rediscover my true self again. Happiness is attainable in fact. However inescapable this rambling nonsense is I cannot furthermore deny my longings. secondguesses are worse than thinking it through altogether. reaction. React. Act. Come together. It all falls into place somewhere down the line. Hopefully sooner than later because all the waiting grows me weary in my heart. Elation. condemnation never seemed so far away and now it is far beyond my train of thought. Destiny knows not what Future holds in store. Nevermore questions frivolity but I care not to notice. Even though guilt hangs in the shadows of the night I walk along the thin line separating sanity and illusion and for once see clearly that the past is not to return again as much as either had hoped for it. Farewell to forever ago as now is here again. If I knew all the answers then I would need no questions and simply no direction to go forth; but of course every now and again I seem to pull together and realize that I shall take on the world. Perhaps not alone but maybe better off than the prior escapades had led me toward. Alas I do not fear or try not to while i’m here but that’s all I can expect from me today.

marelle

thought intelligent creative rambling inspired love life writing